Post Undergrad Confusion

So now that I am standing at the cusp of the real world, in my senior year of college, I have no idea what I want to do with my life. I mean when I first came to college it was "I want to be a news anchor." After coming to the realization that being a reporter would have to be the first step in anchor-hood, "I wanted to be a reporter." Recently it was "I want to be a news producer." Not really knowing that it meant putting together an entire news cast, writing stories, doing interviews, calling people, etc. with the added bonus of telling an entire newsroom what I want and how I want it.

Can I do that? Is it in my blood? Is it in my genes? Is it in my heart? I have no idea. Somebody lied to me when they told me I'd have it figured out by my last year of college. What I do know is that I have to keep moving forward, making everyday count. I had an interview today at channel 3 in Champaign-Urbana and they told me I would have to be proactive and involved in the newsroom. To be memorable I have to put myself out there, be a do-er. I CAN do that. But I'm nervous.

Little fact you may not know: my greatest fear is making a mistake. That's the suckiest fear of all because we make mistakes all the time; it's how we learn and grow. I'm in the face of my fear always. I want to be right, all the time. I hate being a newbie, those first few months on a new job kill me. But that's something I'm just going to have to deal with. I pray God gives me the courage I need to dive in head first and blow their minds.

Someday in my life, in the future, I want to be great. Great like my Father said I would be. Great at something whether it be producing, anchoring reporting, scuba diving, whatever. That's not much to ask. In a lifetime we all become great or at least good at something. I just hope my greatness will dwell in my work and not my ability to complain; unfortunately this is a definite possibility.

To you I pray you are unequivocally and undeniably great in your lifetime. I pray God shows you your talent early on in life and you excel to lengths you didn't even know existed. And if you're already seasoned in life I pray God shows you how great you can still be. It's in you, I know it. I hope you do to.

God bless.